Yay

Thought it was about time for a post-Christmas update, mainly because in ten minutes Kristy will stick her head up and go “You haven’t done a blog in ages!” (Kristy, do some work.)

Yay for being back at work! (But not really.) It is cold and annoying, but it’s a familiar kind of cold and annoying.

Our department somehow shares air conditioning with the equipment management department, who spend all day running round throwing eftpos machines at each other (or something) and so need to have the aircon at an inhumanly cold level so they don’t get too hot and, I don’t know, explode. This means that we poor salespeople, sitting here motionless at our desks for 8 hours a day, are constantly in Arctic temperatures and have to wear our jackets inside, in the summer. Our previous boss tried to stop us complaining by saying “See, in the winter it’s warmer than outside, and in the summer it’s cooler than outside, so it’s always comfortable!” Freak.

I had a nice Christmas. Did you have a nice Christmas? I went to Nelson and did pretty much nothing for four days except eat and drink and read and smoke and sit in the sun. Interestingly enough (depending on your definition of interesting), I have done nothing but vomit since returning to Wellington. I think I have an allergy. It is lucky that I am moving. (Moving Countdown: (not the supermarket, although when I think about what a mission that would be it makes me feel a lot better about moving house – imagine moving into Countdown, how much would that rock – no, actually, the Warehouse would be way better because you could sleep in the Manchester section – they should combine the two and lease it out – anyway!) Moving Countdown has 5 days to go. Have abandoned ‘get organised, find movers, neatly pack and label boxes’ plan and am now going with ‘throw out everything inessential, forget to book ferry until last minute, sleep in and have to run to taxi stand whilst digging through pockets in the frantic hope of finding enough change to make it to the ferry terminal’ plan, which if we’re being honest was always the more likely plan anyway.)

Someone’s phone rang before, startling us all, and she answered it with a cheery “Thank God, it’s not work-related!” Which I think sums up how all of us are feeling about work today.

I am trying to think of places to go and buy a coffee. Why do cafes get to close from Dec 24 to about Jan 5? Why do I not get to close?

Oh go away, boss, I am trying to slack off and you are interrupting me. Leave me in peace to finish my in-depth analysis of why my love life is comparable to Napoleon’s invasion of Russia. (They both failed miserably, in case you were wondering. No-one’s written an overture about my love life yet, but then it is early days.)

DANCE THE ROBOT WITH US
WE SAID, DANCE THE ROBOT
NOT LIKE THAT
IS THAT REALLY HOW WE LOOK WHEN WE DANCE
HOW EMBARRASSING
beep whirr beep