*May not actually be interesting.
1. Someone made an anonymous comment on my previous post. Anonymous comments piss me off. Own up!
2. I went to the doctor, and the doctor gave me sleeping pills (v. good) and antidepressants (not so good). Not so good as a) am not depressed and b) what kind of doctor gives sleeping pills to depressed people? What do they think we're going to do with them? Doctor also suggested excellent psychologist she knows, who only costs $140 an hour. Doctor: "Well, you get what you pay for." Strongly suspect that psychologist is a personal friend of doctor, and that they are congratulating each other over a beer as I write this. Have come to the conclusion that it's time for a new doctor.
3. I am in the process of being highly impressed by Sarah Palin. Is this an uncool point of view? I don't like her policies, but I'm very impressed by the way she handles herself in interviews. If she didn't believe such stupid things, I would vote for her. If I was an American. As it is, I am not an American, and I get Helen vs John. Much less exciting. Saw him in an interview on breakfast TV and her was terrible. In my opinion, if you can't stay calm and collected in an interview on breakfast TV you probably shouldn't be allowed to run a country. Ooh, look, I have a political blog.
4. Am beginning to worry that I am becoming poster child for excess - too many nights out drinking and being debauched are beginning to take a moral toll. Because of this, I am going to have a month of being Very Well Behaved (it will be the most boring month I have ever endured - the more that I think about it, the less fun it seems) in October. Obviously this means that I must spend the remaining 5 days of September in a drunken stupor.
6. Workmate and I are going to start a band! He said last weekend after drinking quite a lot of tequila, "Ally, I love you! Let's start a band." Turns out he was serious about the band (but not about the love). He's a very good pianist and arranger, and can also sing. I'm not sure what my contribution is supposed to be. Think is some sort of singer/songwriter/lyricist role. Will be interesting, anyway. And yet another commitment! Because, you know, I don't have anywhere near enough of those.
7. Was talking to business banker today about a company called EMF Something - I was trying to find it in our systems and said, "So it's Elizabeth, Mary, Sally?" (I can't remember the proper military system - I am a constant disappointment. Something Something Sierra?) "No," she said, "F for Freddy. Elizabeth, Mary, Freddy." Pause. "That could be interesting! (dirty chuckle.)" I was shocked! I am never going to do any business banking ever again.
And now, to bed. Have not taken sleeping pill because am afraid will sleep FOREVER and miss work.
Showing posts with label band. Show all posts
Showing posts with label band. Show all posts
Thursday, September 25, 2008
Friday, March 28, 2008
Gold Coast, etc.
Finally, an update! Have been a busy little bee so not much time for internetting. also, internet access was REALLY pricy at the hotel and outside time was dedicated to shopping or band.
Had a much better day after last post - went for a walk across the river by our hotel, which I think was the Brisbane River but perhaps I made that up. There's a huge market over there, full of lovely tacky touristy crap, some of which I bought. Wish I had splashed out for a leather purse in the shape of a dog's head (it was better than it sounds from that description, I promise) and also for little leather keychain animals, which I could've given to all and sundry. As it is I am going to give all and sundry excuses as to why I didn't buy them a souvenir. "Because," I shall say, "I couldn't find any."
So it turns out we didn't come last in the marching - we came about fifth to last, but this is a lot better than we usually do. We would've done better except someone farted right before the stepoff and people got the giggles.
We also didn't come last in the main competition itself - we in fact won the main competition, which was great and unexpected as we had no idea of the standard of the other bands. So now we are officially Australasian champions.
Umm...I know I did a lot of stuff in Brisbane, but most of it is a) uninteresting unless you're in a brass band or b) one of those had-to-be-there things or c) too long a story to tell when you're paying for your internet.
Last night of contest was every bit as debauched as usual - after-match function at some hotel, which was amusing as the lobby was huge and pristine and empty when we arrived, with this tiny bar in the corner and two barstaff and a night manager with looks of slowly dawning horror on their faces as a small army of victorious bandsmen poured through the doors, waving trophies and the bottle of bourbon they'd been swigging from while the results were being read (no, actually).
Ended up going to the casino at some mental hour of the morning. The casino was Large and Neon and full of people even though it was about 2am Monday morning. Australia is fun! Got lost in the casino trying to find the toilets - I'm not sure if this was just because of the size of the casino (suspect amount of alcohol consumed may also have been a factor) and the brightness of the neon, and the blinking of the lights, and the freakin' HUGE chandeliers and things (jealous of my casino experience?) but it was BIG. Distinctly recall drinking out of the trophy the band received then being told that the last person to drink from it had previously vomited. Hygiene was not a priority. Thank God the trophy did not come down the Gold Coast with us (more on that later).
I shall draw a curtain over the rest of the evening except to say that I got back to the hotel about 6am, wearing someone else's earring and with an unfortunate bruise on my neck. Which I was hassled about constantly for the next two days.
Then there were solos, a bit of swimming, went out for dinner to a restaurant near the fake lake - it's got palm trees around it and lights under the water, which changes colour every few minutes, and sand which is actually golden and feels like gingerbread mix between your toes. Not that I've actually squidged gingerbread mix between my toes, but i've squidged it between my fingers and I can't imagine...I'm going to give up on that sentence. you get my point.
Drove down to Surfers Paradise Monday night, have been here since (obviously) - apartments we're staying at are about 3 minutes walk to the beach, which looks EXACTLY like it does on the postcards (although I suppose that shouldn't really be a surprise). All golden sand and blue sea and high-rise buildings and beautiful tanned people. Beaches aren't as busy as I thought they might be, probably because it's not peak holiday season, which means there's enough room to play soccer and cricket on the beach and swim about merrily in the waves, both of which I've been doing a lot of. This post is grammatically terrible. Sorry. I'm going fast.
Went to Dreamworld on the Wednesday (Tuesday was taken up mainly with swimming and beaching (in the playing-on-the-beach sense, not the running aground sense)). Dreamworld was amazing - I know that's a touristy thing to say but there were ROLLERCOASTERS and I don't get out much. If you want a rundown of the rides go and look on their website or something - the best one was one where you get pulled up the side of a tower, with your feet dangling in space, to the height of a 40 story building, then you sit at the top for about a minute trying not to panic, then they DROP you. And you scream. The first time we went on that, there were I think 4 band people and 3 randoms, and as we got near the top the band guy sitting next to me said in a voice which was very close to panic, "ok, let's sing the march." And he started singing his part of the march in a very strained tone. Then as soon as we got off at the bottom we ran about whooping and decided to do it again. The second time, as soon as we started going up the side of the tower there was a chorus of "whose fucking idea was it to do this again?" Was terrifying I think mainly because of dangling feet. Also suspense of sitting at the top for almost a minute, waiting to DIE. People swear a lot on amusement park rides. Went on this thing called the Claw, which was the most terrifying, and the guy next to me, who is generally very staunch and has an emotional range that covers happiness, boredom and anger and that's about it, started shouting "Fuck! Fuck! Shit! Oh my God!" about thirty seconds into the ride, and didn't stop until we got off. Then he went and sat down.
Anyway that should do for now - am going to go back to the beach and lie in the sun for a bit. Perhaps I shall have an icecream. Apologies for badly-written blog, will fix it up when back home.
Had a much better day after last post - went for a walk across the river by our hotel, which I think was the Brisbane River but perhaps I made that up. There's a huge market over there, full of lovely tacky touristy crap, some of which I bought. Wish I had splashed out for a leather purse in the shape of a dog's head (it was better than it sounds from that description, I promise) and also for little leather keychain animals, which I could've given to all and sundry. As it is I am going to give all and sundry excuses as to why I didn't buy them a souvenir. "Because," I shall say, "I couldn't find any."
So it turns out we didn't come last in the marching - we came about fifth to last, but this is a lot better than we usually do. We would've done better except someone farted right before the stepoff and people got the giggles.
We also didn't come last in the main competition itself - we in fact won the main competition, which was great and unexpected as we had no idea of the standard of the other bands. So now we are officially Australasian champions.
Umm...I know I did a lot of stuff in Brisbane, but most of it is a) uninteresting unless you're in a brass band or b) one of those had-to-be-there things or c) too long a story to tell when you're paying for your internet.
Last night of contest was every bit as debauched as usual - after-match function at some hotel, which was amusing as the lobby was huge and pristine and empty when we arrived, with this tiny bar in the corner and two barstaff and a night manager with looks of slowly dawning horror on their faces as a small army of victorious bandsmen poured through the doors, waving trophies and the bottle of bourbon they'd been swigging from while the results were being read (no, actually).
Ended up going to the casino at some mental hour of the morning. The casino was Large and Neon and full of people even though it was about 2am Monday morning. Australia is fun! Got lost in the casino trying to find the toilets - I'm not sure if this was just because of the size of the casino (suspect amount of alcohol consumed may also have been a factor) and the brightness of the neon, and the blinking of the lights, and the freakin' HUGE chandeliers and things (jealous of my casino experience?) but it was BIG. Distinctly recall drinking out of the trophy the band received then being told that the last person to drink from it had previously vomited. Hygiene was not a priority. Thank God the trophy did not come down the Gold Coast with us (more on that later).
I shall draw a curtain over the rest of the evening except to say that I got back to the hotel about 6am, wearing someone else's earring and with an unfortunate bruise on my neck. Which I was hassled about constantly for the next two days.
Then there were solos, a bit of swimming, went out for dinner to a restaurant near the fake lake - it's got palm trees around it and lights under the water, which changes colour every few minutes, and sand which is actually golden and feels like gingerbread mix between your toes. Not that I've actually squidged gingerbread mix between my toes, but i've squidged it between my fingers and I can't imagine...I'm going to give up on that sentence. you get my point.
Drove down to Surfers Paradise Monday night, have been here since (obviously) - apartments we're staying at are about 3 minutes walk to the beach, which looks EXACTLY like it does on the postcards (although I suppose that shouldn't really be a surprise). All golden sand and blue sea and high-rise buildings and beautiful tanned people. Beaches aren't as busy as I thought they might be, probably because it's not peak holiday season, which means there's enough room to play soccer and cricket on the beach and swim about merrily in the waves, both of which I've been doing a lot of. This post is grammatically terrible. Sorry. I'm going fast.
Went to Dreamworld on the Wednesday (Tuesday was taken up mainly with swimming and beaching (in the playing-on-the-beach sense, not the running aground sense)). Dreamworld was amazing - I know that's a touristy thing to say but there were ROLLERCOASTERS and I don't get out much. If you want a rundown of the rides go and look on their website or something - the best one was one where you get pulled up the side of a tower, with your feet dangling in space, to the height of a 40 story building, then you sit at the top for about a minute trying not to panic, then they DROP you. And you scream. The first time we went on that, there were I think 4 band people and 3 randoms, and as we got near the top the band guy sitting next to me said in a voice which was very close to panic, "ok, let's sing the march." And he started singing his part of the march in a very strained tone. Then as soon as we got off at the bottom we ran about whooping and decided to do it again. The second time, as soon as we started going up the side of the tower there was a chorus of "whose fucking idea was it to do this again?" Was terrifying I think mainly because of dangling feet. Also suspense of sitting at the top for almost a minute, waiting to DIE. People swear a lot on amusement park rides. Went on this thing called the Claw, which was the most terrifying, and the guy next to me, who is generally very staunch and has an emotional range that covers happiness, boredom and anger and that's about it, started shouting "Fuck! Fuck! Shit! Oh my God!" about thirty seconds into the ride, and didn't stop until we got off. Then he went and sat down.
Anyway that should do for now - am going to go back to the beach and lie in the sun for a bit. Perhaps I shall have an icecream. Apologies for badly-written blog, will fix it up when back home.
Sunday, March 23, 2008
Quiero Irme a Casa
Alas, Brisbane is as I feared all along - have spent a large amount of money to have a lousy time. Lousy lousy lousy. We had better win the fucking contest, is all I have to say.
Saying that I expect the Gold Coast to be worse is like a meteorologist saying they expect a cyclone to do more damage than a light summer shower.
Fed Up! However as there is nothing I can do about it (and can't just hop on a plane as is 'spensive) am going to make best of it. Probably by avoiding everyone else in the world, shutting myself in the bathroom, and sleeping a lot. Except it's usually too hot to sleep.
And yes, I know that I'm on holiday and that not having a good time is mental and all of that, but it is hard to force yourself to have a good time when you're pissed off and cranky and can find no polite way to tell everyone to remove themselves from your immediate vicinity or you will not be responsible for your actions, which is pretty much how I feel. Also depressed. How stupid is that? "How was Brisbane?" "It was pretty depressing, actually." "...oh." So for all intents and purposes I am having a stunningly wonderful time and declare that there is simply nowhere else I would rather be! Actually, to be fair, Brisbane is pretty cool and the hotel is good. If band was suddenly vaporised (or turned into Money for me to spend) it would be the best holiday ever! Perhaps I shall spend the day visualising vaporisations and feeling better.
Am also annoyed as my roommate didn't come back to the room last night - she is 16 and I am meant to be keeping an eye on her, so spent about half an hour this morning racing about in a small panic wondering where she is (v out of character for her to wander off, or so I thought). Am now going to have to say "by the way, if you're not going to come back at night please let me know so I don't worry" and then she will make some remark like "ha ha ha sure, as long as you do the same when you go and sleep in other people's rooms eh." When she says this what she actually means is "I think you're a slut," which is ridiculous as I haven't been even remotely slutty on this trip. Perhaps that's why I'm not having fun? Perhaps I should just fulfill everyone's expectations by being constantly drunk and sleeping around.
Am going to have to go SHOPPING (after saying I'm just nipping out for a cigarette & not coming back - sneaky, I know, but an actual statement of intent to shop would mean other people would come along to give me the dubious benefit of their company).
Anyone who read this entire whiny post, leave a comment and I'll buy you a present for your tolerance. I promise to have a good time today.
Saying that I expect the Gold Coast to be worse is like a meteorologist saying they expect a cyclone to do more damage than a light summer shower.
Fed Up! However as there is nothing I can do about it (and can't just hop on a plane as is 'spensive) am going to make best of it. Probably by avoiding everyone else in the world, shutting myself in the bathroom, and sleeping a lot. Except it's usually too hot to sleep.
And yes, I know that I'm on holiday and that not having a good time is mental and all of that, but it is hard to force yourself to have a good time when you're pissed off and cranky and can find no polite way to tell everyone to remove themselves from your immediate vicinity or you will not be responsible for your actions, which is pretty much how I feel. Also depressed. How stupid is that? "How was Brisbane?" "It was pretty depressing, actually." "...oh." So for all intents and purposes I am having a stunningly wonderful time and declare that there is simply nowhere else I would rather be! Actually, to be fair, Brisbane is pretty cool and the hotel is good. If band was suddenly vaporised (or turned into Money for me to spend) it would be the best holiday ever! Perhaps I shall spend the day visualising vaporisations and feeling better.
Am also annoyed as my roommate didn't come back to the room last night - she is 16 and I am meant to be keeping an eye on her, so spent about half an hour this morning racing about in a small panic wondering where she is (v out of character for her to wander off, or so I thought). Am now going to have to say "by the way, if you're not going to come back at night please let me know so I don't worry" and then she will make some remark like "ha ha ha sure, as long as you do the same when you go and sleep in other people's rooms eh." When she says this what she actually means is "I think you're a slut," which is ridiculous as I haven't been even remotely slutty on this trip. Perhaps that's why I'm not having fun? Perhaps I should just fulfill everyone's expectations by being constantly drunk and sleeping around.
Am going to have to go SHOPPING (after saying I'm just nipping out for a cigarette & not coming back - sneaky, I know, but an actual statement of intent to shop would mean other people would come along to give me the dubious benefit of their company).
Anyone who read this entire whiny post, leave a comment and I'll buy you a present for your tolerance. I promise to have a good time today.
Saturday, March 22, 2008
BrisBand the First
Well, it's the second really, but Blogger didn't let me post the first.
Where to begin? Flight was long and dull, and there's something about playing loud jazz on your laptop at the airport at 5am that makes other people want to kill you, Hugo. Got into Brisbane (really nothing to say about flight except that I watched Priceless, which is really rather good). Brisbane is, in the words of one of our more charmingly spoken cornet players, "hot like a MILF." It is so hot. On the first day we were here it rained and was hot at the same time. Ridiculously hot.
Hotel is lovely! Although internet very expensive (think $8 (AUD) for half an hour) so blogging may become sporadic as I run out of money. Mind you, I spent more than eight dollars on lunch today so must remember to keep these things in perspective. Hotel has v nice bar and restaurant, also outdoor pool with many loungers and potted palms - is on roof. Feel ever so slightly like a movie star when I go to the pool, prancing about in my red bikini and relatively well applied fake tan (this means no parts of me are noticeably different in colour to other parts, except for unfortunate hickey-like splodge on neck which has since faded).
Have become remarkably sick of several members of band who are clinging like limpets, to the point where I'm writing emails in overpriced (but cheaper than lunch) internet cafe & they sit behind me and comment loudly on my Facebook photos. Then I say "Hey I'm actually going to write some emails and my blog now, so you might wanna wander off, I could be a while," instead of taking this polite hint to fuck off they sit about and talk loudly for a further twenty minutes while I grit my teeth and don't blog.
Apart from that all is well - street march was this morning and was good except just before the step-off, as we were all braced up and at attention, one of the horn players farted REALLY loudly and everyone got the giggles. Small mishaps like this have studded our time here so far, but not in any detrimental way. We shall see how we go in the marching.
Hymn and test were a couple of hours ago - we're all pretty hopeful as it went well and the three bands I stuck around to listen to (it's a field of 14) were shite.
Am running out of internet time and am also Hungy, so will finish later!
Where to begin? Flight was long and dull, and there's something about playing loud jazz on your laptop at the airport at 5am that makes other people want to kill you, Hugo. Got into Brisbane (really nothing to say about flight except that I watched Priceless, which is really rather good). Brisbane is, in the words of one of our more charmingly spoken cornet players, "hot like a MILF." It is so hot. On the first day we were here it rained and was hot at the same time. Ridiculously hot.
Hotel is lovely! Although internet very expensive (think $8 (AUD) for half an hour) so blogging may become sporadic as I run out of money. Mind you, I spent more than eight dollars on lunch today so must remember to keep these things in perspective. Hotel has v nice bar and restaurant, also outdoor pool with many loungers and potted palms - is on roof. Feel ever so slightly like a movie star when I go to the pool, prancing about in my red bikini and relatively well applied fake tan (this means no parts of me are noticeably different in colour to other parts, except for unfortunate hickey-like splodge on neck which has since faded).
Have become remarkably sick of several members of band who are clinging like limpets, to the point where I'm writing emails in overpriced (but cheaper than lunch) internet cafe & they sit behind me and comment loudly on my Facebook photos. Then I say "Hey I'm actually going to write some emails and my blog now, so you might wanna wander off, I could be a while," instead of taking this polite hint to fuck off they sit about and talk loudly for a further twenty minutes while I grit my teeth and don't blog.
Apart from that all is well - street march was this morning and was good except just before the step-off, as we were all braced up and at attention, one of the horn players farted REALLY loudly and everyone got the giggles. Small mishaps like this have studded our time here so far, but not in any detrimental way. We shall see how we go in the marching.
Hymn and test were a couple of hours ago - we're all pretty hopeful as it went well and the three bands I stuck around to listen to (it's a field of 14) were shite.
Am running out of internet time and am also Hungy, so will finish later!
Friday, March 21, 2008
BrisBand, part the First
Just did very long post about Brisbane but then blogger couldn't publish it and deleted all my txt. Fuck Blogger. Would redo but have a rehearsal in ten minutes. proper post later.
Monday, March 03, 2008
Not An Exciting Day
I would now like to share a small anecdote which, I feel, sums up how today has gone so far:
It is 12.45. The office is apathetic. One of my podmates returns to the room, clutching a footlong Subway sandwich in his hand. Instantly, about 5 voices pipe up with variations on "What did you get?" with more enthusiasm than has been shown about anything all day. Then we crowd around and look at the sandwich and comment on how long it is and how he will NEVER eat it all. Then we watch as he proceeds to eat it all, and we comment on this.
ARGH BLAH NEW JOB PLEASE.
In other news, band has started gearing up properly for Brisbane - this is great except for when I'm the only person from my section there and actually have to play things, which happened yesterday. Turns out it's quite hard to play and panic at the same time. for a while there I was making a noise like air escaping from a balloon ("eeeeee.....THURP") but luckily this was relatively shortlived. However there is now no band until wednesday, by which time I will have done ridiculous amounts of practice and become trumpet GOD. (practice will all be done on Tuesday because tonight my older sister is in town and we are going for a beer, but still. trumpet gods such as myself never need more than one night to learn a test piece).
How am I going to make my afternoon more exciting? the tragic thing is that nothing springs to mind. I shall just sit there and count down until five. Perhaps I should count down to everything! "5...4...3...2..1...going to the FAX MACHINE!" "5...4...3...2...1...going to STAPLE THIS PAPERWORK!" Or perhaps I should treat the afternoon as if it were an opera (albeit a very boring one) and constantly detail what I am doing in beautiful, dramatic song. "The copier, the copier, I'm going to the copier, it's only three STEPS AAAAA-WAAAAAAY!" Complete with gestures and countermelodies provided by coworkers, of course.
right, back to it.
It is 12.45. The office is apathetic. One of my podmates returns to the room, clutching a footlong Subway sandwich in his hand. Instantly, about 5 voices pipe up with variations on "What did you get?" with more enthusiasm than has been shown about anything all day. Then we crowd around and look at the sandwich and comment on how long it is and how he will NEVER eat it all. Then we watch as he proceeds to eat it all, and we comment on this.
ARGH BLAH NEW JOB PLEASE.
In other news, band has started gearing up properly for Brisbane - this is great except for when I'm the only person from my section there and actually have to play things, which happened yesterday. Turns out it's quite hard to play and panic at the same time. for a while there I was making a noise like air escaping from a balloon ("eeeeee.....THURP") but luckily this was relatively shortlived. However there is now no band until wednesday, by which time I will have done ridiculous amounts of practice and become trumpet GOD. (practice will all be done on Tuesday because tonight my older sister is in town and we are going for a beer, but still. trumpet gods such as myself never need more than one night to learn a test piece).
How am I going to make my afternoon more exciting? the tragic thing is that nothing springs to mind. I shall just sit there and count down until five. Perhaps I should count down to everything! "5...4...3...2..1...going to the FAX MACHINE!" "5...4...3...2...1...going to STAPLE THIS PAPERWORK!" Or perhaps I should treat the afternoon as if it were an opera (albeit a very boring one) and constantly detail what I am doing in beautiful, dramatic song. "The copier, the copier, I'm going to the copier, it's only three STEPS AAAAA-WAAAAAAY!" Complete with gestures and countermelodies provided by coworkers, of course.
right, back to it.
Monday, December 03, 2007
AACK ARGH BLEURGH
...and that's how my job is. Today, every knobhead in the greater Wellington region called and asked to speak to me personally. I should've been flattered, but I wasn't.
"How can I help you," I said, smiling politely, and as one they replied, "You can't, because I am an idiot! I am going to ring up and demand my products RIGHT NOW, even though you have told me on numerous occasions that I have to wait ten days!"
Then I repeat the bit about the ten days, patience is a virtue, etc., and then they go away.
Then, ten minutes later, their business banker calls. Business bankers who actually call are, with one exception (Karen, from the Hamilton branch, who is actually tolerable, because she realises that people are STUPID and IMPATIENT) Big Dicks.
"Hi," they say in the menacing tone only those in the financial sector and, I suppose, the Mafia are able to cultivate, "have I come through to Ally?"
At this point I am always tempted to say "No" in a very confused voice and start speaking Russian.
"Yes," I say, "how can I help you?"
At this point they start in on a tirade about how their customer has been waiting THREE DAYS NOW and it's not good enough because ten reasons that, to be frank, are just not my fucking problem. I say this, very politely, and the business banker is always rude and unpleasant.
I am beginning to understand why people hold up banks.
In other news, Band is going to Brisbane next March for Australian nationals. BrisBand, I shall call it.
I am also going to Brisbane, rather against my better judgment and desire not to live in extreme POVERTY FOREVER. Instead I shall swan about in the sun and chat up people I should know better than to chat up, and maybe even play a little bit of music here and there.
I'm not actually as cranky as I appear. It has just been one of those long, frustrating days where you don't get any work done because you're too busy sorting out other people's crap. Not literally. That would be worse.
However, while I'm complaining, people keep 'tagging' photos of me on Facebook. For anyone lucky enough to have escaped being peer pressured into joining Facebook (it's a bit like herpes in that no-one really wants it but everyone seems to give it to their friends and once you have it you can NEVER GET RID OF IT), 'tagging' photos is when OTHER PEOPLE put photos of you on your homepage.
Usually the photo has been taken of you, blind drunk, with one eye closed and a double chin and a beer in your hand a fag sticking out of your mouth.
And when you say, politely, to your friend who is PARTICULARLY bad at doing this, "Hey, I believe I have mentioned before that I would prefer it if you didn't 'tag' photos of me," they get offended.
Evidently it is a day for ranting. I am now in the (time-consuming) process of removing 'tagged' photos. (No, I am not going to stop using the quotation marks.)
Facebook is almost stupider than business bankers. I bet they have their own little Facebook community and they will sit about and write snarky little messages on each other's whiteboardsTM about how much trouble they caused me today.
I am going to go home and have a BEER and do some EDITIN' and maybe have FISH and CHIPS.
I am also going to put on loud emo music, provided my flatmate isn't home (the one that isn't in India, although to be fair she won't be home either) and jump about. And tidy my room. And wish that some dickhead (I know exactly which dickhead it was, too, and she's in India so I can't even make a passive-aggressive comment) hadn't put a PAPER milk carton into the VERY BOTTOM of the rubbish bin BECAUSE THE MILK SMELT.
Sometimes the very stupidity of people worries me. I'm either an elitist snob or just irritable. Not that the two are mutually exclusive. Now, to end, a list of nice things about today.
Nice Things About Today
- I finished work an hour early because I made many sales last week and got a Leave At Four (sort of like Free Parking, really. If work was like a game of Monopoly, today was not the round where I bought all the yellows, it was the round where I landed on all the hotels that some sod put on the browns and light blues, which don't bankrupt you but are still bloody annoying.)
- Heroes is on the telly tonight, and I like Heroes.
- The Nunch returns to Wellington on Thursday
- I do not have band
- I can do a load of washing
- I do not have to deal with any business bankers until tomorrow
- I am not a business banker
- I am not married to a business banker
- I did not snog anyone inappropriate at the staff party, or fall over in my netball uniform.
- I did not in fact snog anyone at the staff party, or use the word snog. I did chat up someone from I think Finance who was wearing an air force uniform but this is beside the point
- I haven't gotten drunk and declared my love for anyone from band for AGES
- I have nice shoes
- I have ALMOST finished editin' my Seminal Work (actually that's a bit of a lie. Almost finished in the Halfway Through sense of the term)
- I have just joined a Facebook group (see? can't get rid of it. I have started a Facebook vampire army because I'm just that cool) called "I Secretly Want to Punch Slow Walking People in the Back of the Head," which I do. Often.
- I do not live in Dunedin
- or Auckland
- or Wanganui, etc.
See? Really, life is not so bad.
"How can I help you," I said, smiling politely, and as one they replied, "You can't, because I am an idiot! I am going to ring up and demand my products RIGHT NOW, even though you have told me on numerous occasions that I have to wait ten days!"
Then I repeat the bit about the ten days, patience is a virtue, etc., and then they go away.
Then, ten minutes later, their business banker calls. Business bankers who actually call are, with one exception (Karen, from the Hamilton branch, who is actually tolerable, because she realises that people are STUPID and IMPATIENT) Big Dicks.
"Hi," they say in the menacing tone only those in the financial sector and, I suppose, the Mafia are able to cultivate, "have I come through to Ally?"
At this point I am always tempted to say "No" in a very confused voice and start speaking Russian.
"Yes," I say, "how can I help you?"
At this point they start in on a tirade about how their customer has been waiting THREE DAYS NOW and it's not good enough because ten reasons that, to be frank, are just not my fucking problem. I say this, very politely, and the business banker is always rude and unpleasant.
I am beginning to understand why people hold up banks.
In other news, Band is going to Brisbane next March for Australian nationals. BrisBand, I shall call it.
I am also going to Brisbane, rather against my better judgment and desire not to live in extreme POVERTY FOREVER. Instead I shall swan about in the sun and chat up people I should know better than to chat up, and maybe even play a little bit of music here and there.
I'm not actually as cranky as I appear. It has just been one of those long, frustrating days where you don't get any work done because you're too busy sorting out other people's crap. Not literally. That would be worse.
However, while I'm complaining, people keep 'tagging' photos of me on Facebook. For anyone lucky enough to have escaped being peer pressured into joining Facebook (it's a bit like herpes in that no-one really wants it but everyone seems to give it to their friends and once you have it you can NEVER GET RID OF IT), 'tagging' photos is when OTHER PEOPLE put photos of you on your homepage.
Usually the photo has been taken of you, blind drunk, with one eye closed and a double chin and a beer in your hand a fag sticking out of your mouth.
And when you say, politely, to your friend who is PARTICULARLY bad at doing this, "Hey, I believe I have mentioned before that I would prefer it if you didn't 'tag' photos of me," they get offended.
Evidently it is a day for ranting. I am now in the (time-consuming) process of removing 'tagged' photos. (No, I am not going to stop using the quotation marks.)
Facebook is almost stupider than business bankers. I bet they have their own little Facebook community and they will sit about and write snarky little messages on each other's whiteboardsTM about how much trouble they caused me today.
I am going to go home and have a BEER and do some EDITIN' and maybe have FISH and CHIPS.
I am also going to put on loud emo music, provided my flatmate isn't home (the one that isn't in India, although to be fair she won't be home either) and jump about. And tidy my room. And wish that some dickhead (I know exactly which dickhead it was, too, and she's in India so I can't even make a passive-aggressive comment) hadn't put a PAPER milk carton into the VERY BOTTOM of the rubbish bin BECAUSE THE MILK SMELT.
Sometimes the very stupidity of people worries me. I'm either an elitist snob or just irritable. Not that the two are mutually exclusive. Now, to end, a list of nice things about today.
Nice Things About Today
- I finished work an hour early because I made many sales last week and got a Leave At Four (sort of like Free Parking, really. If work was like a game of Monopoly, today was not the round where I bought all the yellows, it was the round where I landed on all the hotels that some sod put on the browns and light blues, which don't bankrupt you but are still bloody annoying.)
- Heroes is on the telly tonight, and I like Heroes.
- The Nunch returns to Wellington on Thursday
- I do not have band
- I can do a load of washing
- I do not have to deal with any business bankers until tomorrow
- I am not a business banker
- I am not married to a business banker
- I did not snog anyone inappropriate at the staff party, or fall over in my netball uniform.
- I did not in fact snog anyone at the staff party, or use the word snog. I did chat up someone from I think Finance who was wearing an air force uniform but this is beside the point
- I haven't gotten drunk and declared my love for anyone from band for AGES
- I have nice shoes
- I have ALMOST finished editin' my Seminal Work (actually that's a bit of a lie. Almost finished in the Halfway Through sense of the term)
- I have just joined a Facebook group (see? can't get rid of it. I have started a Facebook vampire army because I'm just that cool) called "I Secretly Want to Punch Slow Walking People in the Back of the Head," which I do. Often.
- I do not live in Dunedin
- or Auckland
- or Wanganui, etc.
See? Really, life is not so bad.
Wednesday, August 22, 2007
I Feel Better.
I am still intermittently being sick, but this is ok as feel less like DEATH. Shall see how I am tomorrow, hmmm?
I appear to have committed to going and playing pool with Tim of the Stunning Socks and Sandals. So perhaps I shall stay in my sickbed for another day! Hah. No. That would be mean, as tomorrow is...sob...our last night together!
Have decided to come back on Sunday, talked Ryan into collecting me from ferry, so that's all organished. Ish. Unless he is doing something with his girlfriend (have informed him that his priorities are all wrong...but he made the excellent point that if she beats him up, I'll have to play the high notes at band, which is traditionally his job. Not sure I could manage being in sole charge of accidentals AND upper register.) Really must check ferry times & let him know or will end up in hideously expensive taxi. Rather than hideous EMOTIONAL expense of Ryan! Hahaha.
Have checked ferry times. Very proud of myself. Quite an achievement. I am bored stupid. I now know why they say that...I can feel myself getting stupider. Sure I was smarter than this yesterday! Really must get back to Wellington and let brain return to previous state of constant fermentation (ideas fermenting, not a comment on how much I drink when in Wellington) rather than current state of constant atrophy. Oh, the triumphal return! With less hair, but more WISDOM.
Actually, just with less hair.
I shall walk into band and everyone will go GOSH! -and Hugo will fall down dead in surprise (yay!) Ditto for monsoon, flat, general circle of friends, with the obvious exception of Hugo's Imminent Demise. (Anyone wanna come to a lynching?)
Or else everyone will look at me in horror and be very, very polite. Hopefully the former.
Tim has just txt and asked what I see in him. Feel it would be impolite to say BUGGER ALL or COMEDY VALUE so am pretending have gone to sleep. Am possibly not a very nice person.
Right must go as shitty tv movie on and also am possibly going to be sick again. Yay! Better out than in, as my grandmother used to say. She was talking about gas, though.
I appear to have committed to going and playing pool with Tim of the Stunning Socks and Sandals. So perhaps I shall stay in my sickbed for another day! Hah. No. That would be mean, as tomorrow is...sob...our last night together!
Have decided to come back on Sunday, talked Ryan into collecting me from ferry, so that's all organished. Ish. Unless he is doing something with his girlfriend (have informed him that his priorities are all wrong...but he made the excellent point that if she beats him up, I'll have to play the high notes at band, which is traditionally his job. Not sure I could manage being in sole charge of accidentals AND upper register.) Really must check ferry times & let him know or will end up in hideously expensive taxi. Rather than hideous EMOTIONAL expense of Ryan! Hahaha.
Have checked ferry times. Very proud of myself. Quite an achievement. I am bored stupid. I now know why they say that...I can feel myself getting stupider. Sure I was smarter than this yesterday! Really must get back to Wellington and let brain return to previous state of constant fermentation (ideas fermenting, not a comment on how much I drink when in Wellington) rather than current state of constant atrophy. Oh, the triumphal return! With less hair, but more WISDOM.
Actually, just with less hair.
I shall walk into band and everyone will go GOSH! -and Hugo will fall down dead in surprise (yay!) Ditto for monsoon, flat, general circle of friends, with the obvious exception of Hugo's Imminent Demise. (Anyone wanna come to a lynching?)
Or else everyone will look at me in horror and be very, very polite. Hopefully the former.
Tim has just txt and asked what I see in him. Feel it would be impolite to say BUGGER ALL or COMEDY VALUE so am pretending have gone to sleep. Am possibly not a very nice person.
Right must go as shitty tv movie on and also am possibly going to be sick again. Yay! Better out than in, as my grandmother used to say. She was talking about gas, though.
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