Bein' At Work

I am at work! Obviously I am on a break, because I would never be so (bored with my job) irresponsible as to be blogging instead of working. I am eating a banana (on Fridays we get free fruit – something to do with encouraging us to eat healthily, which is nice) and gearing myself up for morning tea, which is sure to feature saveloys – we seem to have them every morning tea. I’m pretty sure work morning teas are the only setting in which I’ve eaten saveloys since I was about five. Not that I’m complaining – I find saveloys to be the most delicious of the almost-meat food group. (Narrowly beating out Sizzlers and luncheon.)

Yesterday I was sick! I am putting my doctor’s children through college. I hope they are happy (and studious).

After going to the doctor’s (who adopts a kind of ‘oh-what-is-it-now’ face whenever I walk into her office) and being disgruntled by stupidly large bill, I went home, fell asleep in front of Oprah, and woke up an hour later in a HUGE panic because for some reason I thought it was Friday morning and that I was late for work. Very depressing, but huge relief when I realised it wasn’t.
Man I am halfway through this banana and I am sick of it already. I am lucky it is not ENORMOUS BANANA of legend.

In other news, what was I thinking with the merzombies? Was I on crack? I am going to write a nice quiet novel about plants. GIANT SENTIENT ATTACK PLANTS! No. Seriously, though, as taken as I am with the image of an enormous, undead mer-army marching silently out of the sea and advancing on Washington (or perhaps a city that is actually by the sea – thank you, Google Maps) it isn’t a particularly great idea. I wonder how I could work merzombies into novel? Don’t think there is a way that doesn’t involve writing a huge fantasy epic. Unsure if huge fantasy epics are really my oeuvre. Will think about this.

Went out for dinner last night to a Creole & etc. restaurant with Sister Flatmate and her boyfriend/partner/thing, which was nice. I haven’t been out for dinner in ages and got a bit over-excited – kept saying, “Ooh, this is nice! This was such a nice idea!” until they were both completely annoyed and probably wished they’d never suggested it in the first place.

Then I went home and fell asleep on the couch. What an exciting life I do lead!

Right, my (boss is coming) break is over, so I had better get back to work.

Pretentious Wankery

This was actually going to be a post about something else completely, but now it is not. It is going to be an excerpt from an (online) conversation about a friend's recent breakup, and it goes a little something like this... (blogroll, please.)

Me: "Sorry to hear about your breakup blah blah sympathy nice supportive things."
Him: "funny thing is, after the natural sting, which dissapated very quickly, i realsied i just dont care - i just want her to be happy" (all spelling mistakes his)
Me: "fair enough! obviously good time to end it then."
Him (and this is my favourite part): "funny...it reminded me of soemthing I worte on a scarp of paper after my first breakup..."At first I thought you had abandoned me, now I know you set me free""
Me: "OH GOD YOU'RE SO DEEP LET'S MAKE OUT." (No, not really. I didn't really say that.)
Bleh, pretentious. Is it meant to scan, do you think?
I am going to write "At first I thought you had abandoned me, and you had, because I was a twat" on a piece of paper and put it in his letterbox.

ANYWAY. What was I actually going to talk about? Oh, ASB are giving little elephant-shaped money boxes away to their younger customers. I wonder why they don't give them to adults as well? It seems like reverse discrimination. Maybe they would if you asked for one. I don't even bank with ASB.

That was not what I was going to talk about. It turns out that I've forgotten what I was going to talk about, what with the pretentious wankery and the elephant-shaped money boxes. I am hopeless sometimes!

Am still sick, but less so. They keep changing my medication (by 'they' I mean the doctors - I realise that sounded a bit paranoid) & the side effects keep differing. Whee. Is quite fun in some ways, though - took meds this morning whilst doing makeup and, about five minutes later, was putting on mascara when I thought "Ooh I feel a bit weird" and as I watched, my pupils went WHOOMPH and became enormous.

Bleh, I have to do the dishes. More on this later. Bleh bleh bleh dishes bleh bleh ooh I feel ill.

Edit:

Have done dishes. It is now later. Have scrubbed two casserole pots free of burnt on casserole that flatmate made last night. Would be feeling a lot less resentful about this if casserole had not given me gas.

Cleaning pots has made me a) feel cranky and b) feel better. At the moment the two are warring within me. Cranky is just edging out better. It's like a drag race between good and evil, except not really.

In other news, I may have to pull out of the show. This is indescribably sucky, but I keep being sick and missing rehearsals. Gah. Am going to talk to the director tomorrow. Gah! Sorry to end on a low note (makes low note noise...booooooop) but feel like I should put some Actual Information in this post, not just, well, crap.

Today's Interesting Things*

*May not actually be interesting.

1. Someone made an anonymous comment on my previous post. Anonymous comments piss me off. Own up!

2. I went to the doctor, and the doctor gave me sleeping pills (v. good) and antidepressants (not so good). Not so good as a) am not depressed and b) what kind of doctor gives sleeping pills to depressed people? What do they think we're going to do with them? Doctor also suggested excellent psychologist she knows, who only costs $140 an hour. Doctor: "Well, you get what you pay for." Strongly suspect that psychologist is a personal friend of doctor, and that they are congratulating each other over a beer as I write this. Have come to the conclusion that it's time for a new doctor.

3. I am in the process of being highly impressed by Sarah Palin. Is this an uncool point of view? I don't like her policies, but I'm very impressed by the way she handles herself in interviews. If she didn't believe such stupid things, I would vote for her. If I was an American. As it is, I am not an American, and I get Helen vs John. Much less exciting. Saw him in an interview on breakfast TV and her was terrible. In my opinion, if you can't stay calm and collected in an interview on breakfast TV you probably shouldn't be allowed to run a country. Ooh, look, I have a political blog.

4. Am beginning to worry that I am becoming poster child for excess - too many nights out drinking and being debauched are beginning to take a moral toll. Because of this, I am going to have a month of being Very Well Behaved (it will be the most boring month I have ever endured - the more that I think about it, the less fun it seems) in October. Obviously this means that I must spend the remaining 5 days of September in a drunken stupor.

6. Workmate and I are going to start a band! He said last weekend after drinking quite a lot of tequila, "Ally, I love you! Let's start a band." Turns out he was serious about the band (but not about the love). He's a very good pianist and arranger, and can also sing. I'm not sure what my contribution is supposed to be. Think is some sort of singer/songwriter/lyricist role. Will be interesting, anyway. And yet another commitment! Because, you know, I don't have anywhere near enough of those.

7. Was talking to business banker today about a company called EMF Something - I was trying to find it in our systems and said, "So it's Elizabeth, Mary, Sally?" (I can't remember the proper military system - I am a constant disappointment. Something Something Sierra?) "No," she said, "F for Freddy. Elizabeth, Mary, Freddy." Pause. "That could be interesting! (dirty chuckle.)" I was shocked! I am never going to do any business banking ever again.

And now, to bed. Have not taken sleeping pill because am afraid will sleep FOREVER and miss work.