Sunday, September 13, 2009

Musical Sponge

Still in W. There are hipsters everywhere. This place is hipstertown, hipster's paradise. LATFH would have a field day! Went out for lunch with a couple of friends and was served by a hipster with a wart. I was over-tired and could not stop laughing. "Perhaps," said one of my friends, "it's how they get their powers." I don't think they have powers, but maybe the wart is some kind of secret signal? Warts are gross.

I went shopping yesterday (and today). Some might, perhaps, call it a 'spree.' Here is a list of the things that I purchased, in order of excitement (least to most exciting).

- A purse. Which was the only thing on this list that I actually needed.

- Earrings which are numbers - 1 is black, 2 yellow, 3 green, 4 orange, 5 red, and 6 pink. I wore the date (12.9) for most of yesterday and clashed horribly with myself. Have calmed down today and am just wearing the black ones.

- A headband with black sequin flowers on it - this is much nicer than I have just made it sound, and very 20s flapper-esque. NICE HEADBAND

- Cufflinks with Lego Stormtrooper heads on them, as a present for someone else

- RED SHOES. For the last 2 years - not kidding - I have been looking for the perfect pair of red shoes. Many times I have almost bought a not-quite-perfect pair out of frustration, but these are the real deal. They're closed-toe, slightly rounded scarlet heels. I love them. I am going to buy a second pair for when the first pair wear out, that is how much I love them. Also after wearing them for a bit I have decided to maybe buy the second pair in a slightly larger size.

- A MUSICAL SPONGE (!!!) I didn't even know there was such a thing. It is large and in the shape of a butterfly and bright yellow with pink wings and it plays "You Are My Sunshine." In the bath. It was $10 and I saw it and went, "I MUST OWN THIS" and bought it.

Then I walked over to my friend Sarah and declared proudly, "I have purchased my sponge!" And it was only when she did not reply that I realised it was in fact a total stranger and not Sarah at all.

Also at lunch I decided that my new Life Mission is to visit the Bermuda Triangle and somehow when Sarah, Todd and I were discussing this it turned into Visiting the Bermuda Triangle and Finding Atlantis, which is In the Bermuda Triangle But Underwater, and then all of a sudden we had realised that Atlantis is where all the Lost Things go - not just socks and cats and wallets, but other lost things too. Marbles, and plots. Loves. Dreams, and hopes. There is a whole room of these - it is very depressing, unlike the place they store the Lost Appetites, which just makes you REALLY hungry, and the very heavy Department of Lost Weight. And then before we knew it we had plotted out a movie with Helen Mirren and Dylan Moran and Emily Blunt and so on, either directed by Tim Burton (although we don't want Johnny Depp and Helena B-C and they seem to come in some sort of package deal) or by Tarantino, although Todd doesn't want too much gore.

People who are not allowed to be in the movie include, but are not limited to: Ray Romano, Sam Neill, Keisha Castle-Hughes (although, as Sarah said, she could ride the whale to Atlantis), Nicolas Cage, Zac Efron, Matthew Broderick and that chick from Twilight as they are all hateful. Apart from K C-H. She is just a crap actress.

And now, to the airport!


omchelsea said...

I am now SO tempted to walk up to people and declare "I have bought my sponge!" all day. Shiny.

otherworldlyone said...

I've never heard of number earrings, but now I'm excited.

As for the red shoes...I've had the same issue. Except, instead of almost buying the not quite right ones...I buy them all. The last ones sliced my toes to ribbons.

All in the name of fashion.

Hilarious post.