*not as in "News flash: I have broken a wiener" (although that did happen once, it was an accident and even though I was very apologetic it did lead to people calling me Crocodile Flange for a while), but as in "Wiener-related news flash"
In a burst of ill-advised activity John Mayer, King of the Wieners, has announced NZ tour dates!
EXCUSE ME JOHN MAYER GET THE HELL OFF MY LAWN
Who thinks I should go and heckle?
"Your body is a wonderl-"
"FUCK YOU JOHN MAYER YOU ARE A WIENERRRRRRRR"
And then I get ejected from the venue but it is totally worth it.