Friday, February 27, 2009

Today at work I...

- delivered the immortal line, "Is Mr Wiggle available, please?"

- had the following exchange. Me: "Is Mr Jones available?" Woman on other end of phone: "No, he's dead." Me: (hang up because for some reason this gave me the giggles despite being entirely unfunny.) Jesus.

- had the following exchange. Me: "blah blah cheap holidays." Elderly-sounding gent on other end of phone: "Actually I can't take holidays, I just had a quadruple bypass." I was about to say "Gosh, that's fair enough!" then laugh gaily and hang up, but the gentleman continued with, "It didn't work, so I don't have very long to live." Oh. My. God. Oh my God! He was so nice, though, rattled on about how he used to live in Christchurch. Was terrified my boss would hear - he is the type of person who would have said, in response to quadruple bypass question, "Well, what better way to spend the time you've got than on a relaxing resort holiday?" No, actually. That is the sort of thing I am meant to say. I'm not sure I'm pushy enough for this job.

- coined the unique phrase, "Well, if that's your cup of tea, I'll just...leave you to enjoy it." Was talking to a woman who didn't give a hoot about our resort holidays because she enjoys backpacking. Got halfway through the sentence and realised I had no idea where I was going. You are welcome to use this exquisite phrase, but please be aware that I do eventually intend to copyright it.

- wondered if perhaps being a hooker would have been a better route

- giggled at my 'root' pun for, like, 5 minutes

- had a bubble-gum blowing contest with a couple of colleagues (did not win)

- discovered that cute colleague is 17 (!) and that I am cradle-snatcher. Whoops

- did not make any sales. Cute colleague (CC, for future reference - have decided to blog about workmates as it would be highly unlike me to say anything unflattering) was the only person to make a sale. Have decided he is not cute after all, but jumped-up upstart with poor taste in shirts. Hmph.

- drew a penguin

- made a paper dart

- died inside, just a titchy bit

3 comments:

a cat of impossible colour said...

How many titchy bits make up a whole body?

JOIN TWITTER. I joined this morning and am now crazed Twitter-addicted maniac.

Word verification today is JOYPOP. Bwa ha ha ha!

sleep500 said...

The "to post on twitter" verb is "tweeting"

L
A
M
E

IT IS ALLY said...

AHHH you're right that is lame

if I wanted to tweet I woulda been born a bird