Gettin' Some Answers, Part Two

the rest of your questions, answered

You appear to leap into conversations, has it backfired? Or do you pick your subjects carefully? - Gary

Well, Gary, I do like to think I follow the old adage, 'listen before you leap (into conversations)' fairly closely. However, it has been known to backfire -most notably when I started talking to a group of trendy hipster acoustic guitarist types about how I thought all trendy hipster acoustic guitarist types were pretentious wankers. I was right, though.

Also sometimes I start telling a story that is relevant to the conversation but still inappropriate i.e. we are discussing eels and then all of a sudden we are discussing eel porn except actually we're not discussing it because I am the only person in the room who is even aware it exists and I appear to be delivering some kind of informative eel porn lecture and everyone is listening in fascinated horror and wondering just how much detail I intend to go into. So yeah. Sometimes that happens.

Have you ever owned slippers that resembled an animal? - Gary

Yeah man! When I was little I had a black & white pair that were based on some kind of animal, (I no longer remember which animal it was) and they were really comfortable. In a classic example of 'things which seem completely normal when you're a child, but horribly fucked-up when you're an adult', you shoved your foot into the animal's neck.

Did our ancestors, perhaps, wear skulls on their feet? The Internet says no, but I'm not sure I believe it. Someone give me some money for research.

What part of your body is most sensitive to fear, recognition or happiness? - Gary

Can I just say, this is such a weird question.

When I'm afraid (which is freakin' never because I am like a hot female Chuck Norris who doesn't know any martial arts) I feel ill, so I guess the stomach for fear. If you meant, 'which part of you is most likely to scare people,' it is probably my brain.

Like most people (not the blind), I recognise people with my eyes, and get déja vu more than I get déja smelt/felt/tasted/heard. So I guess my eyes would be most sensitive to recognition.

That being said, whenever I sing a song I've written I have a mental image of wherever I was when I wrote it, and there is a bathroom in a pub in Wellington that conjures up memories of a band thing about 5 years ago and I have no idea why. Something to do with the air freshener, but I never smell it anywhere else.

My heart be's most sensitive to happiness! And also my mouth because it goes all smiley all by itself. I wouldn't like to comment on which part of me makes people the happiest.

Which book do you wish you had written? - Andrea

From a financial point of view, the Harry Potpot series. From a literary point of view, David Eddings' Elenium because I'm insanely jealous of his world-building abilities. I suck at world-building because I have no patience and a poor eye for continuity, but he does not suck at it at all.

If you were a character in a pantomime, which one would it be? - Holly

Probably the irrepressible sidekick who sings ragtime and gets in the hero's way.

Have you decided whether or not to chop your hair yet? - Holly

Currently, all major appearance decisions have been swept away by the tsunami (which I always pronounce 'sue-na-MY' unless I think 'salami, salami' before I say it) of excitement which is MY NEW ONESIE. Photo soon.

Hairwise - short, for now. It looks nice long, and I can do more with it, but I feel more like me with short hair.

How old were you when you started drinking (liking?) coffee? - Holly

Ooh I don't remember...maybe about 12, 13? I do remember making myself cup upon cup of awful instant coffee, black and really strong, because I felt not being a coffee drinker would be simply too much for my image to recover from. See also: playing a respectable game of pool, learning how poker actually works, sitting in a dark room & occasionally 'rocking out' to Tool because that's what the other uni kids were doing. Tool was a mistake.

Who was your favourite Backstreet Boy? - Brooke

Well, they all had their ups and downs. I was a huge BSB fan about the time I was learning to love coffee, and so I consider myself qualified to present them in order of least favourite to favouritest ever (aka the one who was eventually going to fall in love with me through some highly improbable set of circumstances). Sorry about the shitty image quality.

5 - AJ

Seriously. The man just screams douchebag.

Also, he spent all his time rapping and looking sifty, and that is not my cup of tea unless it is being done by Eminem.

Also, he reminds me of Ali G, and always wore awful glasses even when it was not sunny.

What more do I need to say? LAST PLACE TO AJ.

4 - Howie

Poor old Howie. Despite being moderately talented and okay-looking, he was never anyone's favourite.

Because he was so boring.

Still, he was better than A 'Douchebag' J up there.

3 - Nick

Dude, eww. Why did so many people love this undercut-sporting, whiny-voiced pretty-boy?

The only reason he's not at the bottom of the list is because back in the day I sort of liked him because everyone else did.

I did have a bit of a crush on Aaron Carter, though.

What was I thinking? They grew up and made that horrible reality show.

It's over, Nick BSB. Have some dignity. Let it go.

2 - Kevin

Kevin is totally grown-up-me's favourite.

He was only my second favourite because at 12 I hadn't really got into the whole bad boys thing yet.

Also he was far too old for me.

He's probably about 40 now.

That is really sad.

1 - Brian

YAY BRIAN!

Not only was he good-looking (compared to, you know, AJ) but he was also talented (he wrote some of the songs) and sung lead when Nick wasn't poncing about being all 'my undercut brings all the boys to the yard.'

Brian was 100% legit!

I think he may have turned out to be gay.

5ive, BSB, NSync, Westlife, Boyzone, or Hanson? - Brooke
I should really say BSB but totally Westlife.

Which is the better word: daft, or loom? Discuss. - Brooke

Like the Backstreet Boys, different words have different merits. As far as I know 'daft' only has one meaning, but then 'loom' only has one (common) pronounciation. At the end of the day, I can't decide. America will have to vote.

What's the longest your hair's ever been? - Brooke

Ehh...probably about down to m'boobs. My boobs. Not manboobs.

What's your favourite one-hit-wonder song? - Brooke

Haha, maybe Pseudo Echo's cover of Funkytown? Then again, maybe something else. All of the music I like is incredibly embarrassing & usually when people ask me about favourite bands I tell whopping lies. Then later on they find out that actually I kind of liked All American Rejects and that one song by the Rasmus and they never look at me the same way again.

Which is why I decided to be ironic in my answer to that question.

Where in the world is Carmen Sandiego? - Brooke

Please Brooke she is made up did you think I wouldn't know that?

If you could turn one TV programme into real life or live in it, which one would you choose? - Christina

I would live in Footballer's Wives, but sometimes visit Boston Legal and/or Mile High.

If lollies and chocolate and things were used instead of medicine, what would you use instead of Morphine? - Christina

In terms of what would be most likely to keep me sedated, probably either raspberry K Bars, of the rather politically incorrectly named Redskins. (Does anyone else remember when those used to have an Indian Chief's head on the wrapper, headdress and all?) I am a complete sucker for chewy, raspberry-flavoured candy.

Sparkles (the sprinkle-covered chocolate buttons, not to hard candy) would definitely be hallucinogenic. Pebbles would be your common-or-garden painkiller, milk bottles would cure calcium deficiency, and gummy worms would prevent tummy worms. Licorice would be some sort of emetic, and giant jellybeans would, sadly, be taken as suppositories.