Swiiiiiine Fluuuuu!

Well, Christchurch is now officially in the grip of Swine Flu! I probably shouldn't be this excited, but it's so rare that NZ gets to be good at anything that surely I can celebrate us being good at Swine Flu.

In other news, today is to be a day of cleaning - the house has turned into a festering cavern of filth (well, not really, but it is a bit messier than normal) and am worried that we're harbouring Swine Flu. Swiiiiine Fluuuuu! So I am cleaning the bathroom and kitchen and my bedroom and, in keeping with the theme of the day, roasting a chicken. (It seemed a suitably domestic thing to do.)

The crazy dreams continue - over the past few nights we have had the following: me as a chain-smoking, Indiana-Jones type treasure hunter who accidentally killed my lover whilst on a cross-country mountaintop mission; me as a psychotic actress starring in a horror movie featuring some of the most grotesque monsters imaginable; and (my personal favourite) me as a vampire ninja with telekinetic powers, part of an elite squad of vampire ninjas with similar X-men-esque abilities whose job was to travel over land and sea (no, really, we went from being on a ship to stalking through a forest) hunting and destroying vampires who brought shame on the race by not being hardcore enough. Such vampires included Edward from Twilight - the other members of the crack vampire ninja squad spoke scathingly of what a pussy he was - and, obscurely, Eminem.

Or, if you prefer, Emonem. Image from Worth1000.

I also realised that about a quarter of my dreams take place in the same city - it's not a real city, although it shares topographical features with several places I've lived - but I could draw a detailed street map of it quite confidently. I do have a lot of dreams set in other places - many of them in random unspecified town/city/country settings - but this particular city has a definite feel about it. It's very ominous, as if the city itself is overseeing everything that happens and making sure it goes sickly wrong. Every time I have a dream set there I discover a different part of the city, although there are buildings and establishments that crop up again and again - I'll stop for a drink at a pub that was the main setting of a previous dream, or I'll visit the same dairy/restaurant/high school/theatre as I did in a previous dream. From time to time I run into the same minor characters - dairy owners, people loitering by ATMs, bartenders. None of whom I've met outside this dream city, of course. Every time I have a dream set in that city I realise it as soon as the dream starts - not in a lucid dreaming kind of a way, I've never been able to control my dreams, but more in the sense that the dream-me gives a resigned sigh at being in Twisted City.

Is that weird? It's weird, isn't it.

To take your mind off my weirdness, here's something lovely that I discovered this week - AnnaTheRed's Bento Blog. "Why should I go and read that," I hear you ask, "it will probably be porn." Well, here is why. AnnaTheRed made this.


OUT OF FOOD. She is insanely talented (at making pictures out of food.)

And here, for those of you who expect less of me, is a picture of a small child in a Hitler outfit.

Hahahaha. Hahahahaha. I am going to be the best mother ever.