Monday, December 14, 2009

Describe A Boner*

*it's harder than you think!
- James

Hey guys (and girls) -

Zach and I (mainly me) are conducting some investigative reporting (what? I work for the newspaper) and I would like you to tell me what a boner feels like (if you are male) or what you think a boner feels like (if you are female). Maybe you could ask your partner, as well?

- Zach

TALK TO ME ABOUT BONERS. I want everyone who reads this post* to leave a boner-related comment. Be anonymous if you like, but leave one.

*not you, Dad.


ps if you are in NZ and you have a phone number that reads like this: 0274354567* then the correct way to write it is 027-435-4567 and NOT 0274-354-567 which is INCORRECT. I know that's a stupid thing to get annoyed about. But it really annoys me.

*don't call this, I made it up but it could still maybe be someone's number

10 comments:

IT IS ALLY said...

YOU SHOULD BE COMMENTING BY NOW

Gary said...

Very hard question. Intended. But they do have different moods.

But mostly it’s a 30 second build up alike to immersing yourself in a very hot spa pool and then a constant of being totally relaxed in said spa pool. That’s if its in its natural habitat and unmolested.

IT IS ALLY said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Joff said...

It's like suddenly gaining a couple of pounds of weight. Warm, throbbing, *awesome* weight.

Ahem. Eww. Wow, I managed to even squick myself out there a little bit.

I'm also a bit confused as to how to write aussie cellphone numbers

I go with 0488 377 367*, but I've seen some people use 048 8377 367.
NOONE has told me the correct form. :(

*that's totally my phone number. You can call me anytime ;)

**in hindsight, these two comments should probably not been put side by side

apple cheeked, potato shaped girl said...

Maybe it's like a fist. The one you make when someone is really pissing you off. At first its just a fist, possibly hidden behind your back.

But gradually (or not depending on how much sleep you got) it creeps around to the front, you crook you elbow and all of your energy is diverted to that arm, and the only thing you can think about is punching them in the face.

Aly said...

Ha. You said boner.

I'll bet it feels like restless leg syndrome. Or a cramp in your calf, only more pleasant...sometimes...when someone is there to rub it out.

Ha. I said rub it out.

otherworldlyone said...

Sorry. That last comment was me. I forgot to switch to my not so secret identity.

a cat of impossible colour said...

The quotes look like little poems about boners. You should combine everyone's answers and make one long poem. It will be magnificent.

a cat of impossible colour said...

After giving it some thought, I think it feels like when you poke a bruise and it hurts but also feels kind of good, and then it progresses to feeling like you're holding a couple of divining rods out in front of you and you're standing on a really enormous water source.

a cat of impossible colour said...

Joff: in my opinion (which is completely uninformed), whatever the common element is should come first and be separated from the rest. For example, the area code for Christchurch is 03, and so should be divided from the rest of the number by a space, for clarity. :)