Adverts for women's incontinence pads are ridiculous and getting more so. They used to refer to a "slight bladder weakness," and then they referred to "frequent unexpected wetness" (tee hee hee) but now it's called "light bladder leakage," or the more catchy and politer-for-tv LBL, as in LOLWLBL (laughing out loud whoops light bladder leakage). First of all, leakage is kind of an icky word but second of all, what's wrong with just being honest? They could say: "Ladies, if sometimes a little bit of wee comes out by accident, that's ok. Wear our product and, except for the split-second look of horror on your face, no-one ever has to know." Truth in advertising, people.
Although I am not prone to LBL except for that one time when I was super drunk and didn't get my tights off fast enough, I checked out the website. It was pretty interesting:
"Chester C. Wilmot, MD discusses the different triggers that can cause women to leak urine and how they can overcome these triggers."
"I just can't explain it, doctor, but every time I get into a lift I experience a slight bladder weakness." And then you eventually trace it back to a childhood incident where you got stuck in a wardrobe and eventually urinated on your mother's best suede shoes and OH GOD IT'S ALL COMING BA- pssssss!
"At least 96 percent of women with stress incontinence can have their problem cured." Stress incontinence sounds like something that happens when you fail to contain your nervous wee. It probably isn't.
"Have a towel close by to use as needed---why not consider getting something colorful and fun, or whimsical to use?" -response to a question about LBL during sex. "Oh, sorry darling, there goes my LBL again! Quick, hand me the Hannah Montana Beach Fun! wrap."
"Most people probably think of restroom trips as an inconvenience. But this process enables your body to rid itself of waste products."
This... wait, what? Is this news to some people?
What did they think going to the bathroom was for?
There's also a blog, presumably run by someone who never fails to kill the 'so what do you do' line of conversation; a regularly updated blog, all about incontinence I mean light bladder leakage. Aren't you glad my blog isn't about light bladder leakage?* The first post starts "There are moments in life when opportunity falls right in your lap." Let's hope it doesn't fall on the bladder part of your lap, because we all know what happens then.
*Usually, I mean. Today is an exception.